When you’re approaching a woman who’s surrounded by a crowd of her friends, it can really be a daunting prospect. Most men find one woman difficult enough to work up the nerve to talk to, but when she’s surrounded by five more, it’s just too much. Additionally, those friends of hers might not like the idea of you stealing her away, even if it’s just for a few drinks or a night at your place. It’s up to you to convince her that you’re just out to get to know her better, without a crowd of people in the way.
Respect Her Choice of Company
Even if you think they’re in the way, your prospective lady is friends with these people for a reason. If she didn’t like them and enjoy their company, she wouldn’t be around them. With that being the case, you insulting her friends is not going to win you any points. Plus, unless they’re outright mistreating her, those kinds of comments are fairly uncalled for. After all, to them, you’re just some guy intruding on their night out by trying to snatch their friend away. You might feel the same way if one of your friends ditched you while you were out together so he could go off with some chick.
Being friendly to the people she’s hanging out with will only help you. Best-case scenario, they might turn out to be fairly cool people themselves, and wind up inviting you to hang with them some more. Worst-case, they continue to be jerks to you, but your polite and civil responses to them might win you the sympathy of your chosen lady, and maybe her phone number for later.
How to Get Her Away from Them
Some guys deal with this dilemma with the time-honored trick of fighting groups with groups. Meaning, you approach a group of ladies with a group of guys, and ask them as a whole if they’d be interested in a round of drinks, a dance, and so on. This approach can also head off any jealousy issues her group of friends might have with only her being the one getting hit on.
If you’re out alone, however, things can get a bit more complicated. You’re most likely to succeed in getting her away from her friends if she’s clearly bored or not having a good time. If she’s sitting off to the side, not participating in their conversation, she might appreciate the distraction you provide by approaching her to talk. Don’t just ask her to come off with you right away. That’ll set off the creep alarm bells in her head. Just talk to her as you normally would chat with a lady, and bring up splitting from the group as it seems natural in the conversation. If her friends seem insistent on not letting her out of their clutches, don’t try playing the knight. Again, being respectful to her friends, no matter how rude they’re being, will only win you her sympathy. Offer her your phone number; tell her you’d love to take her out to the café down the street this coming Saturday, and wait for her to call with her apologies for her friends’ behavior.